When You Learn To Identify and Manage Your Expectations You'll Experience More Joy In Every Area of Your Life

In one of my recent segments on Great Day Louisiana, I talked about managing expectations because we all have them whether we realize it or not, and being aware of them is important because they influence our feelings and behaviors.

An expectation is simply a strong belief that something will happen, and every conscious decision we make and action we perform is based on a likely outcome, in other words, an expectation.

It’s healthy to have expectations of ourselves and others. It’s good to have expectations of respect, affection, quality time, and intimacy in our personal relationships just as it’s important to have expectations at work too. Respect for your time and boundaries that allow you to exist outside of work, too, etc.

And while expectations are important, keeping them realistic is equally important. We often have high expectations for ourselves, which is something we have control over. We also have expectations of others, and when they’re not met (when we expect too much from others) it can lead to feelings of disappointment, frustration, anger, and even resentment.

Trying to convince yourself to have no expectations is futile too because we do it consciously and subconsciously because we’re built that way. Having expectations is part of life, but it’s important to identify the expectations we’ve placed on others and ourselves.

I often encourage my clients to take several minutes to list them out. Seriously, write them down. If you realize that you have unrealistic expectations, which can apply to yourself, and perhaps, to others, you can start redefining them once you’re aware of them.

Things change, and that means it’s important to routinely challenge your mindset. You wouldn’t use the same cell phone you used 20 years ago, so be sure you’re not holding on to beliefs or expectations that aren’t serving you anymore. Again, when we don’t adjust our expectations to make them realistic for the season we’re in, then we’re setting ourselves up to experience disappointment, frustration, anger, and even resentment.

Once we’re aware of our expectations it’s important to communicate them because when we communicate our expectations it allows us to build trust in relationships and minimize disappointment and the other negative emotions that I listed above.

We can have healthy expectations by keeping them low and recognizing that there’s always room for growth and improvement.

The benefits of having clear expectations are…

1.     They provide clarity. When people know what we expect from them, they can choose to agree or not. Regardless, clarity is key.

2.     They empower us. Having a clear understanding of our expectations breeds confidence because we know what we expect of ourselves and others, which leads to more informed decisions that are not driven by chaos or emotions.

3.     They help us practice and hone our communication skills. Who couldn’t use more practice in this area?

4.     They create growth opportunities. Clear expectations create opportunities for constructive feedback rather than complaining, passive-aggressive behavior, or unsolicited criticism.

I’m hosting a free webinar on this topic next Monday, March 27th, because I believe it’s important for us to identify, communicate, and manage our expectations, and I enjoy helping people do that.

If you’re interested in experiencing less disappointment and more joy, sign up here and join me! I hope to see you there!